Do you like my poem?

before my eyes pictures appear

from long ago but still clear

with skies of blue wind in my hair

we shared the moment without a single care

i still remmember one summer's day

she held my hand to lead the way

and showed me tresures love in her smile

wild flowers were in bloom

wearing a crow of dew

and sunrays on the leaves danced in and out of view

hear the stream thts flowing by swallow flying in the sky

all the beautis of the land

i began to undrestand on tht day she held my hand

while the perfume in the air

takes my senses unawares

giving joy without compare

Do you like my poem?
It's awesome!!! Don't even listen to that dude who said no. I wish i could do that, but i do write books so i'd listen to that girl who made some suggestions in your poem. She seems good at it. It's awesome!!!!! :-)))))
Reply:It's beautiful and very descriptive.
Reply:its a really good poem
Reply:I like it. it takes courage to publish something like this for anyone to see. For that I salute you.
Reply:yeah its good, i *ed and () remove things that i think would make it flow a bit better.



before my eyes pictures appear

from long ago but still *are* clear

with skies of blue wind (in) *throughout* my hair

we shared the moment without a single care

i still remmember one summer's day

she held my hand to lead the way

and showed me tresures love in her smile

wild flowers were *all* in bloom

(wearing) *draped in* a crow*n* of dew

and sunrays on the leaves danced in and out of view

hear the stream th*a*ts flowing (by) *with the* swallow flying in the sky

all the (beautis) *beauties* of the land

i began to undrestand on th*a*t day she held my hand

while the perfume *lingered* in the air

(takes) *taking* my senses unaware(s)

giving joy without compare
Reply:no
Reply:constructive criticism...

(but I'm no professional, mind you)

it's good for a rough draft!

you might want to work on editing it, revising, maybe

add periods and commas and semi-colons and etc

to show where you want to pause, it gives the reader

more of a realistic chance to see what kind of tone

you want to set for your piece.



you seem more concerned with rhyming with

the next word, or few words.. which reads awkwardly..

and makes it sound more sing-song like.

Perhaps that's my own prejudice, but it doesn't seem

to follow any particular rhyme scheme other than tying

the first few and last few lines together.



personally, to answer your question, it doesn't fit my taste, no.

but its good.. keep up the good work.

i've read worse.

practice, practice, practice. :)



The sources are some websites that may help you.

Good luck and keep writing!